MRS D: It was. It was. He had to grow up by himself and we spoiled him a little bit. My kids are all boys. Except that girl. That baby, she was a girl that died. 

KAREN: Okay. So you didn’t have running water, electricity…

Again, a transition that looks abrupt in writing, but wasn’t as it was happening.

MRS D: Not for a long time, no.

KAREN: So when did that arrive at your house?

MRS D: I think when one of my babies was born, the fifth one, then I had it already. But the others, I didn’t have that. 

KAREN: So all these babies born at home by… candlelight?

MRS D: Lamplight, oil lamp. And washing diapers, what they don’t do now. Ohhh. Washing diapers and even if we had the toilet to rinse out it was, but we didn’t have that and we didn’t have that much water. We had to carry the water. 

KAREN: It was a big job, wasn’t it? (I’m still incredulous.)

MRS D: Yes, and sometimes, I think and wish, children could see how we would do that.

KAREN: I agree. (And hope they will, via these stories.)

MRS D: Now they are too lazy to even wash the diapers. They just buy them and throw them away. 

KAREN: That’s right, that’s right.

MRS D: I never had a Pamper.

We discuss the circumstances that led to the still birth, during which Mrs D told me she preferred having her subsequent births in the hospital because “the children weren’t around and I couldn’t see what all needed to be done in the house.”

MRS D. I hope I’ve helped you with this a little.

Karen: Yes! This is great. 

We had to reassure many of the women that the stories of the lives they had lived were worth telling, were worth listening to, and were interesting just the way they were being told. I did that here for a few minutes.

KAREN: So you asked to go into the hospital?

MRS D: Yeah.

KAREN: And was that unusual at all?

MRS D: Oh I don’t know, when I was pregnant I said right aways that I would go to the hospital for that. 

KAREN: After the babies you had at home, you stayed in bed a few days? Did you feel you needed to stay in bed or was it the custom?

MRS D: It was the custom to. 

KAREN: Did you feel like you wanted to get up and move around?

MRS D: Not very much, no. My back was very sore. 

KAREN: So then, when you had your babies in the hospital, the same thing, how long did you stay in bed then? 

MRS D: Oh, I think a good week.

KAREN: A good week?

MRS D: Mm-hm. At that time they kept them in the bed longer than they do now. 

KAREN: That’s right. 

KAREN: Did you keep your babies in the room with you?

MRS D: No.

KAREN: No? They were in the nursery? Did you feel that affected the way you… you know how they talk nowadays about bonding. 

MRS D: I had it there for nursing.

KAREN: They brought the baby to you for nursing. 

KAREN: Did you feel strong, during labour and delivery, or did you feel like this was going to break you into little tiny pieces?

MRS D: I didn’t know what was going to happen. I was scared. 

KAREN: But in general, you felt strong?

MRS D: Yeah, not too bad. 

KAREN: I know a lot of women, when they go into the birthing experience and the pains get strong, they think, “I can’t do this!” Did you get those feelings?

MRS D: Yes I did.

KAREN: You did? How did you get through that? You didn’t have drugs, how did you get through that? 

MRS D: No I didn’t have drugs.

KAREN: So who helped you?

MRS D: Well, nobody did really, I just told my mother and the midwife. 

KAREN: So your mother stayed with you throughout the birth? Were you happy about that?

MRS D: Yes.

KAREN: Yeah, finally? (I was thinking of her earlier comment about how she wished her mother hadn’t been present.)

MRS D: I didn’t mind at that time, but I would have liked it much better if she wouldn’t have been.

Her concern later was for her privacy and modesty, not the strength of the relationship, which was good.

KAREN: What about prenatal care? How was that for you? 

MRS D: Yeah, I had to do that too.

KAREN: Did you go to the doctor, or did you see the midwife? 

MRS D: I did go to the doctor but I had been at the midwife too. For the first one I didn’t have no doctor, and then I did go to her I think once before the baby was born. She wanted me to come there before it was born to see me and check on me. (“She”? Was the doctor a woman? Why didn’t I follow up?)

KAREN: So how often would you go to see a doctor or the midwife for a checkup? 

MRS D: I didn’t go that often but I did go quite often to the doctor. 

MARYANNE arrives at this point, having already concluded the interview she was doing in the same residence. We explain to Mrs D why we’re doing this book. “Why,” not “that.” She already knew the purpose of the interview.